…but Seriously Please Don’t Share.

Overheard on Sunday:

“I was washing them this way to try to get the hair off.”

…coming from the kitchen while eating in the dining room at Arby’s. Actually, as my wife recalls, this employee had just returned from the bathroom. I’m not sure if that’s better or worse. Trying to reason about it just makes my head hurt and my stomach sad.

“…washing them…”? “…hair off.”?! <Shudder> Pardon my harsh letters1, but WTF does that mean?

Not to let that ruin a perfectly mediocre meal, I went to refill my tasty beverage on the other side of the restaurant where I overheard another gem (from another employee):

“Actually I’ve had some bad luck lately with boy friends—two committed suicide. The first one shot himself and the second one hung (sic) himself. My boyfriend now’s in rehab.”

Are you kidding me? Like is this one of those times that people make up ridiculous stuff to say, hoping to be overheard? Something along the lines of: “and I’m like, ‘how do you expect me to remember where we buried her?’” I hope so…

Really I have only myself to blame. As we were driving home from church, Sarah suggested the nearby Arby’s for lunch. We’ve been to this location before and had previous regretful experiences (slow, a little dirty…or sticky…what is with that at fast food places? Did a shaggy dog take a bath2 in some full-sugar Pepsi and shake/dry off all over the restaurant? Yuck.).

Nah, I thought, this will be different. And it was…different. I might never eat roast beef again. At least not until I forget all this in a few weeks and accidentally eat at Arby’s again.

On a barely related note, check out this ad-vs-actual round up of fast food sandwiches.


1 comment

Sarah said on 2009-06-24

That was awesome. The whole thing. Good thing my 9-months pregnant self peed before reading that, cause, well, I don’t think I have to say it…

Comments closed


  1. A Hat-Tip to Dane Cook 

  2. Also Dane Cook