Dear NASA, I Officially Request One Space Shuttle
Public Communications Office
Washington, DC 20546-0001
On my way into work today I heard that you’re looking for a new home for the newly retired space shuttles. It seems that a lot of prestigious museums are getting in on the action and I thought, why not me?
Sure, I’ve never really been into NASA, space, shuttles, or even airplanes but I have a few reasons why I’m the best candidate.
I realize this is just a formality but in keeping with the rules I should mention the following regarding the application requirements:
- I have the facilities to store Blasty indoors. In the summer we can use my two-car garage. In the winter (when it’s too damn cold and I want my car in the garage) I’ll keep her at the nearby mulch company—they have a lot of experience winterizing RVs and boats so they should be able to do the job
- I have as much experience caring for space shuttles as most people and I promise to read the manual
- I can’t exactly cover the $28,800,000 it’ll cost to prepare and transport Blasty but I have that all figured out if we act quickly. It looks like you’re scheduled to land in about two hours. The local university has an airstrip two miles from my house—just land there!
I look forward to your favorable decision.
Sarah said on 2011-03-09
Awesome and hilarious. Good work, babe :) I think you have a real shot!